the only question really is which is the feminism which is most destructive
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1This isn't true reconciliation. The true way to handle this sort of situation at a church is to give the dude's ex-wife his old elder position. She clearly earned it having to suffer such an abusive marriage.
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2Where does it hint/say he was abusive? His porn use wasn't good, but if it arose from her frigidity... maybe she was abusive 🤔 Regardless, no circumstance warrants for a woman to become an elder. Ack.
That was precisely the joke, my irony is a little too dry today