@vitalis @Kierkegaanks There's about two dozen flavors of baptist around a 5 mile radius of my childhood home so even they're all different flavors of batshit.
I remember one woman, Victoria, nuttier than squirrel shit. Her pastor "informed" her of a whole bunch of "knowledge" so she argued with a science teacher until she was blue in the face about how there's breathable oxygen in space, that Africa is a country, and that our brains are made of metal. Also some real fun story about how her pastor stuck an "electric rod" into the river he was standing in and God's love protected him. I just remember she was deathly afraid of balloons and my being any sort of queer meant she tried to bully me until I rubbed two balloons together and she ran headlong into an old door trying to escape the sound.