I have a problem and it's not a womanizing or a sex problem (i fucking love women btw) or a drug problem or even an alcohol or anything like that problem. I have zero issue abstaining from all of these. I think I need to stop putting people especially people not directly involved in my life before myself. I think I will be a lot more happy if I stop focusing on trying to always solve everybodys problem and just focus on what makes me happy
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Hi @graf, we don’t know each other, but trust me when I tell you to drop this. Think for yourself first, there’s nothing wrong with that. More importantly, there’s often more to lose than to gain by helping someone. You never know if your help will truly be appreciated, and most of the time, you may end up alone when it’s your turn to need help.
I’ve been in situations with both wealthy and very poor people, and honestly, humanity can be disappointing. That’s a hard truth for many to accept, but it doesn’t make it any less true. So go ahead and avoid unnecessary burden.
I’ve been in situations with both wealthy and very poor people, and honestly, humanity can be disappointing. That’s a hard truth for many to accept, but it doesn’t make it any less true. So go ahead and avoid unnecessary burden.
my issue isn't whether or not maybe this will end up costing me because its definitely going to cost me somehow whether it be financial emotional physical whatever. whenever I need help the only people I can turn to is you guys but the only help I can turn to you guys for is help with the site. I have friends IRL but I could never ask them to do something like cosign a car or a house or a loan or something like that, I have too much pride. I have on one occasion used a couple friends from poast as references for something but I would never ever put anybody on this webzone in a position where they would ever be out anything.
I want to help this person. I want to help these people, I should say. I want to. but there are some things that happened between the first time I was asked for help until now that always stick out in my mind. and i want to talk to her about it in person. there is also a 4 year long issue we need to discuss before i consider it but every time I bring it up "we can write up a letter and agree on it and sign it with lawyers!" and because this is an ESL person you can't just be like "no, like there need to be safeguards for both parties" and its just. I'm just so tired man. I can hear in her voice every time I talk to her that she is tired and she mentions me helping her and she just sounds happier over all and its just all burning my brain
I want to help this person. I want to help these people, I should say. I want to. but there are some things that happened between the first time I was asked for help until now that always stick out in my mind. and i want to talk to her about it in person. there is also a 4 year long issue we need to discuss before i consider it but every time I bring it up "we can write up a letter and agree on it and sign it with lawyers!" and because this is an ESL person you can't just be like "no, like there need to be safeguards for both parties" and its just. I'm just so tired man. I can hear in her voice every time I talk to her that she is tired and she mentions me helping her and she just sounds happier over all and its just all burning my brain
If you want a lawyer, plan on a lawyer; shouldnt you call a lawyer to get them started, looking into the details, then turn off your phone and get away from it? So you can push as much stress onto the lawyer.
I think I need to make a list of things I am concerned about, things I feel mislead about and things I am misunderstanding and sit down and have these answered before I consider anything else. I think that is my step right now
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13i feel sad because i know what the right answer should be but i am having a real hard time accepting it. if i can get answers in person to the issues i have and they do or don't satisfy my concerns it will make the decision much easier. i think this is what i should do
You need to get above that, Graf.
Sit downs are nice and heartfelt.
Sit downs are also where promises that cannot be kept are most often found.
Whatever you got going on, plan on the worst case scenario.
Sit downs are nice and heartfelt.
Sit downs are also where promises that cannot be kept are most often found.
Whatever you got going on, plan on the worst case scenario.
this has weighed heavy on my soul for several months friend. something needs to be in place by june
What's the risk?
well I become the principle lendee and I am responsible for about 500k remaining on the mortgage. until that mortgage is paid off, I can't have another mortgage according to my sister so property I am actually interested in buying and building on I can't for as long as that property has anything owing on it. it will soon have a lien on it for something unrelated which will add an additional 100k to it, which will also unfortunately become my lien. houses in the area sold for 980 for similarily sized which is a loss of about 400k from the value of the original mortgage. there's a lot of cons involved, I would have to sit and think but my brain is tired now
@graf @AsukaNeko @JustJohnny @kioshi @monkyyy
One of the worst things that can happen in real estate is emotional attachment. You never truly own property even when it’s paid off. It can be taken from you by imminent domain by the city/county, which happened too my home i grew up in when the county widened the road.
Then there’s the real estate bubble that we are in. Property is way over valued right now and the correction is starting too happen. Its cyclical. I once bought a fourplex for $200,000 then 2008 happened and i lost the property too bank auction where it sold for $70,000. I sold three other houses for a profit at the time but the one i actually lived in got foreclosed.
There is also a shadow inventory of vacant housing units that are being secretly withheld by the jews too keep the market prices high. America has over 16 million units in shadow inventory.
Right now is the worst time in history for noobs too be buying real estate.
One of the worst things that can happen in real estate is emotional attachment. You never truly own property even when it’s paid off. It can be taken from you by imminent domain by the city/county, which happened too my home i grew up in when the county widened the road.
Then there’s the real estate bubble that we are in. Property is way over valued right now and the correction is starting too happen. Its cyclical. I once bought a fourplex for $200,000 then 2008 happened and i lost the property too bank auction where it sold for $70,000. I sold three other houses for a profit at the time but the one i actually lived in got foreclosed.
There is also a shadow inventory of vacant housing units that are being secretly withheld by the jews too keep the market prices high. America has over 16 million units in shadow inventory.
Right now is the worst time in history for noobs too be buying real estate.
I'm not buying real estate, I would be taking over somebody who wants to exit a mortgage with somebody. It was bought at 1.1m, appraised at 1.2m last fall but a neighboring house in the avg sq footage that had upgrades besides the kitchen which is done in this house sold for 980 so I am very wary for this woman because the person she is moving this divorce from is not a nice person and from what I have read him say he's not very intelligent which is funny because somebody else in his family lead me to believe he was for the entire time i knew her but that is a story for another day
@graf @AsukaNeko @JustJohnny @kioshi @monkyyy
If it has a bunch of bedrooms you could rent it out to a sorority.
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If it has a bunch of bedrooms you could rent it out to a sorority.
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nigger there's already a sorority living in it
@graf bro, I know you are a good person and human that wants to help however you can't help everyone. If this one thing is going to burden you more than anything else, it's not worth it. You are a person that has their own life to look after, who is gonna look out for you when all of this is over, plus in the next four years, life anywhere near North America is going to be very shitty, I doubt it will get better and not because I don't have hope, I'm being very realistic. It's ok to say no, you will not be a bad person for your choice. They might freak out but that's not your problem. Just politely decline, if they get mad or angry with your response, it'll show their true colors especially if they were counting on manipulating you. Good people get manipulated the most, you shouldn't be taken advantage of just because you have a good heart and are willing to help. Saying "no" will not make you a bad person no matter how much your hero ego may say otherwise. It's ok to decline something and not give the full reason, "I'm sorry, but with much consideration, I have to decline the offer for personal reasons". Everyone who is non-manipulative will be ok with your answer considering how big of a favor it is and if they won't, that's not on you either. I hope it helps your outcome.
to be honest friend I don't have anyone looking out for me. I have a couple american friends who would drop anything and drive up to visit me but I can't rely on that. got me mum and sister, guess thats it. Most of my high school friends are dead from OD or suicide, the ones left all have families and moved away. I guess I've just been trying to build happiness for myself where it hasn't been for a while. Always given everybody everything before I ever considered myseld. Always been like that
I will absolutely invest the fuel money to gas you up, friend. Simple reciprocity. Nothing more, nothing less expected. I thought I was going to have to go it alone and you guys have proved me wrong to date. Wish I could do more but I know you want to figure out the tough answers on your own, just with some sounding board service just to talk through it.
I would gas you to* mars chick. elon would be like "how the fuck did this chick make it that far" and you know that 🫵🏻